Let Wall Street Hold a Bake Sale

I think this would be a really great time to demonstrate that a capital market, free from bureaucratic  government meddling, will self-correct and bob to the surface like a buoyant, radiantly healthy champagne cork.

While that's self-correcting, the government ought to rescue the working class, by which I mean all people who work for wages, and many who work for commissions or fees.

• Unfair mortgages must be re-negotiated, so that people can pay them off and keep their homes.
• Commercial banks and investment banks must be kept apart, as they were before Bushy neocons trashed the Glass Steagall Act.
• And the FDIC maximum insured amount must be raised to about $250,000, as Senator Obama recommends.

In the unlikely event that the capital market proves unable to heal itself, and asks for help from the government, perhaps a loan could be arranged.  The terms should be liberal, but businesslike.  The government should be seen in a fiduciary relationship to the tax payer.  Alternatively, the government might purchase preferred stock in ailing firms, at current market value, and sell them at a later date, when their value has appreciated.

Finally, Republican marriage must be banned, all Republicans must be made to wear a yellow dunce cap, and be prohibited from fishing from municipal wharves.